In the May 23 issue of Rolling Stone, comedian Marc Maron was asked how he sabotaged a once promising career with his own self-inflicted failures. These four points excerpted from that article contain some excellent advice on how to lose a great career. They are easy ways to blow up any other relationships, too.

Be Really, Really Unpleasant. Bitterness is a surefire way to ruin your career. Bitterness is really just amplified self-pity. And no one wants to be around that.

Burn Every Bridge. Just assume that whomever you’re working with doesn’t talk to anybody else who might hire you.

Double Down On Trouble. If a relationship is going bad, let it destroy every other part of your life, too. If your job’s going bad, let it destroy your relationships. If you’re going to do it, do it across the board.

Hit Rock Bottom. To salvage your career, you have to blow it completely. Out of that humility will come your truest self. Instead of being cocky and angry, you’ll come back with a little beat up, raw and “just trying to do my best here” attitude.

With a hugely popular podcast, new cable TV show, and best-selling book, Attempting Normal, it seems Marc is rising after hitting rock bottom. Not that many people do. Too often, people are unaware of their own “success” in destroying their careers/relationships and are left wondering how they could have been mistreated so badly.

Maron’s wisdom is that forcing others to share our pain pushes them away and doesn’t make the pain go away, either. Instead, we need to seek out people or situations that shift our attention and emotions to something positive even if it can only be for brief periods. We need to take responsibility for our emotions and likewise take responsibility for the emotions we bring to others.